In a panic over my finances. What should I prioritise?

25 November 2021

Question by Carolyn

I have taken time out to care for young and old. I have a small teacher pension as I was not on the pension scheme as a supply tI teacher. I had to use cash assets during the time I was a carer. I pay rent and my husband has a property which I have contributed to the maintenance of over the past 7 years. A bit tired now and working online - not enough hours - teaching due to shielding over past two years.

So in a mortal panic about most things. Caught in a gap between city and coast and trying to keep the property for the child when am gone. Mess. I have small pot with tps and nest. Looking for online work and fearful of self employment. Is this typical of the cost of caring. I did have a chance to invest but needed cashflow as little financial support due to partner being unemployed (resting) as a actor and depletion of work in VOs over last decade. Feeling embarrassed. What should I prioritise?

Answered by Boring Money

Hello Carolyn,

First of all, I wanted to acknowledge your honesty about your feelings and the details of your situation, it takes courage to tell your story.

Before we begin the process of prioritising, we need to go back a couple of steps and know why we’re prioritising and then what we’re prioritising.

The why – what is the overarching goal? Is it to gain more control over your financial affairs? Is it to establish a better financial foundation to help make later life more comfortable for yourself and your partner whilst also supporting your child? These are just a couple of suggestions. It’s important to take some time to really understand what you want to achieve as this will become your ‘anchor’ for your future decision-making and source of motivation.

The what – you may find it helpful to sit down with a trusted friend to create a handful of areas that are important to you. See if you can arrange your story above into less overwhelming and clearer themes.

Prioritising – look at your themes from above. If you had to focus on one area, which area would start you on your way towards your goal in the shortest timeframe and/or require the smallest amount of effort? Motivation is key here; what you decide to start with may not seem the most logical but will give you the all-important boost to get started.

I hope you’ll find the guidance above useful. If you would like to discuss further please feel free to contact me.

Best wishes,


Answered by

Boring Money