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Holly's Blog: Make bank and get bag

3 May, 2019

This week we’re adding to your very modern financial vocab. Dear reader, you gotta get bag whilst you can if you wanna make bank.

Get bag

A story this week from a much hipper lady than I, an artist with half a million followers on Instagram. She was outraged when a brand – spouting worthy tales of female empowerment stories – used her in a photo shoot, but then shoved her in the background and quite literally cut her head off in Instagram posts, promoting their brand. Sure, they tagged her, trying to leverage her half a million followers, but didn’t see fit to do her the courtesy of using her face. Ironically this feature on female empowerment did not pay her and digitally decapitated her. Classy.

Too many companies – even some of the financial giants I work with – will ask individuals to speak at events or help them out at no fee. Or get them onboard for a story or article and then doctor the message. This lady artist will not be exploited again and sees she has about a decade left to work this Instagram strangeness. “Nobody loves a 50 year old influencer so you gotta get bag whilst you’re young,” she says. #gulp #noonetoldmaryberrythat

I’ve been obsessed with this new language all week. Getting bag is being paid for what you do. And onto our next term: making bank is shoring up your financial future and financial freedom.

Exotic don’t make bank

You don’t make bank by trying to be exotic. I saw an advert this week for the trading platform eToro, where you can basically copy and follow other traders. The smallprint at the end confirms that “65% of retail accounts lose money when trading CFDs with this provider”. Sixty-bloody-five!!! CFDs are ‘Contracts For Difference’ – ridiculously over engineered investment alchemy which lets you bet on future price movements in a vastly inflated way without actually owning the things in question. Nightmare.

With that etched onto my retinas, here are a few starter everyday tips for making bank:

  • Make bank with cash. Don’t leave long-term cash lying around in your current account. Look at fixed rate deals as appropriate or consider the stockmarket for 5 year + timeframes.

  • Add bag to your pension. Are you working your workplace pension enough? Find out if your employer will match any extra contributions you make – this is money for jam.

  • Make bank go further with an investment platform (https://www.boringmoney.co.uk/learn/articles/speed-round-stocks-and-shares-isa-2019/). Invest in decent companies or reputable funds which buy shares in solid businesses doing things which you understand.

  • Make bank for your kids with a Junior ISA (https://www.boringmoney.co.uk/learn/articles/bank-of-mum-and-dad-junior-isa/)

  • A loyal customer of an energy company is very likely to be a ripped-off customer. Switch regularly.

  • Don’t change money at the airport. Get a pre-paid card or at least order in advance from the Post Office.

  • Avoid CFDs or anything weird. If it’s too hard to explain or compute, leave it well alone.

  • Remember there is no such thing as a free lunch. Shiny schemes which look suss probably are.


Over and out for now and have a great weekend. 4 hours left this week to get bag and make bank ;0)